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(Guardian)   Divorced, beheaded, died, divorced, beheaded, survived   (theguardian.com) divider line
65
    More: Ironic, Sexual intercourse, Human sexual behavior, Human sexuality, Marriage, Church of England, civil partnerships, Homosexuality, E House of Bishops  
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7086 clicks; posted to Main » and Politics » on 23 Jan 2020 at 10:31 PM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Copy Link



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All_Hollowed_Out [TotalFark]  
Smartest (7)   Funniest (0)  
2020-01-23 5:26:14 PM  
LOVE Horrible Histories!!
 
Benevolent Misanthrope [TotalFark] [OhFark]  
Smartest (21)   Funniest (2)  
2020-01-23 6:56:07 PM  
<shrug> The Church of England can say whatever it likes to its parishioners.  Let's see how many of them agree, and how many disagree enough to vote with their feet.  And donations.
 
Alwysadydrmr [TotalFark] [OhFark]  
Smartest (6)   Funniest (2)  
2020-01-23 10:33:36 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
King Something  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (3)  
2020-01-23 10:36:26 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
capacc  
Smartest (6)   Funniest (3)  
2020-01-23 10:36:57 PM  
I guess the Church of England is just giving up on getting new members.

Appears they never read Matthew 8:5-13
 
ucan'tcmee  
Smartest (2)   Funniest (1)  
2020-01-23 10:39:53 PM  
GET BENT!!
 
Aquapope  
Smartest (2)   Funniest (1)  
2020-01-23 10:42:05 PM  
If I had chosen the Bishops of the Church of England to advise me on moral matter, I might give a shiat.  But instead I chose Tommy Chong and Stewie Griffin.  Who the hell do they think they are?
Who the hell do you think you are
Youtube 9i3xwhIsD88
 
Kevin72  
Smartest (7)   Funniest (0)  
2020-01-23 10:42:41 PM  
Who is this "God" that has a "purpose" that gay sex "falls short of", and why should any care about this purpose in order for it to fall long of instead of short of.
 
Chuck87  
Smartest (1)   Funniest (3)  
2020-01-23 10:48:13 PM  
That is their religion and has been that way for hundreds of years.
 
Mambo Bananapatch [BareFark]  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (3)  
2020-01-23 10:48:47 PM  
Sounds like a Tarantino film.

/dnrtfa
 
TheHubby  
Smartest (10)   Funniest (1)  
2020-01-23 10:51:02 PM  
And yet, they wonder why religion is fading into the garbage heap of history...
 
edmo [TotalFark] [OhFark]  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (26)  
2020-01-23 10:51:48 PM  
I guess that's the end of premarital sex once and for all.
 
Quadlok  
Smartest (6)   Funniest (1)  
2020-01-23 10:57:20 PM  
I was watching a show where this architectural salvage company exclusively dealt in English churches that were closed due to lack of congregants. I wonder if they have stock I can buy, because dumb shiat like this will only increase their business.
 
Latinwolf [recently expired TotalFark]  
Smartest (2)   Funniest (3)  
2020-01-23 10:59:48 PM  
Beheading, bah, pussies
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
SBinRR [OhFark]  
Smartest (1)   Funniest (0)  
2020-01-23 11:02:54 PM  
Does the COE still receive government funding?
 
TylerParry  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (2)  
2020-01-23 11:11:04 PM  
Butt stuff doesn't count. No take backs.
 
Dknsvsbl  
Smartest (4)   Funniest (2)  
2020-01-23 11:11:37 PM  

MasterPython: I wonder what they will do if a member of the Royal Family comes out of the closet? There are a bunch of little princes and princesses who may not be straight and they probably won't want to hide it like their ancestors.

OOOOO I Know, Know..
James I, you know, the guy they named the KJ version about?
 
SansNeural  
Smartest (1)   Funniest (6)  
2020-01-23 11:11:46 PM  

Kevin72: Who is this "God" that has a "purpose" that gay sex "falls short of", and why should any care about this purpose in order for it to fall long of instead of short of.


God is the Heavenly Creator who made us and this place for us to live in.  He created us in his image, which is why we kill each other - as He has a history of killing us.

So God's purpose for us is to fark, multiply and kill.  If you just fark and kill... well that's falling short.
 
NuvvuNikki [TotalFark]  
Smartest (25)   Funniest (0)  
2020-01-23 11:15:13 PM  
I do enjoy the irony of a church created to change the rules of marriage refuses to change the rules of marriage.
 
Incog_Neeto  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (2)  
2020-01-23 11:24:48 PM  
They should try practicing what they preach
 
nitropissering  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (1)  
2020-01-23 11:27:07 PM  
"The Church of England has stated that sex belongs only within heterosexual marriage, and that sex in gay or straight civil partnerships "falls short of God's purpose for human beings". "

So, wars, earthquakes, floods etc. are the devils purpose for human beings?
 
mrinfoguy  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (2)  
2020-01-23 11:30:41 PM  
Pasqual is on the phone.. he wants to know if anyone wants to take a wager or something.. and hes gone.
 
SansNeural  
Smartest (1)   Funniest (2)  
2020-01-23 11:37:09 PM  

nitropissering: "The Church of England has stated that sex belongs only within heterosexual marriage, and that sex in gay or straight civil partnerships "falls short of God's purpose for human beings". "

So, wars, earthquakes, floods etc. are the devils purpose for human beings?


Nope.  Noah wasn't saving two of every creature from the clutches of Santa.
 
ababyatemydingo  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (3)  
2020-01-23 11:40:29 PM  
Yes, I'm celibate.

I sell-a-bit, and the rest I give away
 
SansNeural  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (3)  
2020-01-23 11:42:28 PM  

ababyatemydingo: Yes, I'm celibate.

I sell-a-bit, and the rest I give away


You spelled "mastur" wrong.
 
Biledriver  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (4)  
2020-01-23 11:46:34 PM  
Teriible Tudors
Youtube fAmRSHRwADE
 
ababyatemydingo  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (3)  
2020-01-23 11:49:32 PM  

SansNeural: Kevin72: Who is this "God" that has a "purpose" that gay sex "falls short of", and why should any care about this purpose in order for it to fall long of instead of short of.

God is the Heavenly Creator who made us and this place for us to live in.  He created us in his image, which is why we kill each other - as He has a history of killing us.

So God's purpose for us is to fark, multiply and kill.  If you just fark and kill... well that's falling short.


Fark user imageView Full Size


Oooooo! I love this game!

Ok:
Lana: Fark
Pam: Multiply
Cheryl: kill
 
lostcat  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (16)  
2020-01-24 12:22:31 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
pkjun  
Smartest (5)   Funniest (1)  
2020-01-24 1:00:27 AM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: <shrug> The Church of England can say whatever it likes to its parishioners.  Let's see how many of them agree, and how many disagree enough to vote with their feet.  And donations.


I got married in a rural CoE church. In the area there were eight churches, managed by two vicars on a rotation for services; only one church had services every Sunday. Used to be they all had their own vicar.

They're greying out of existence. No surprise there. They have very little to say to anyone under 50 or 60, and open homophobia goes down about as well with most British young people as open racism does.
 
psychosis_inducing  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (1)  
2020-01-24 1:11:02 AM  

ababyatemydingo: SansNeural: Kevin72: Who is this "God" that has a "purpose" that gay sex "falls short of", and why should any care about this purpose in order for it to fall long of instead of short of.

God is the Heavenly Creator who made us and this place for us to live in.  He created us in his image, which is why we kill each other - as He has a history of killing us.

So God's purpose for us is to fark, multiply and kill.  If you just fark and kill... well that's falling short.

[Fark user image image 334x216]

Oooooo! I love this game!

Ok:
Lana: Fark
Pam: Multiply
Cheryl: kill


I always liked calling it Shoot, Screw, or Marry. Rolls off the tongue better.
 
American-Irish eyes  
Smartest (1)   Funniest (0)  
2020-01-24 1:35:02 AM  

Biledriver: [YouTube video: Teriible Tudors]


I loved this show as a kid.  It may have played a role in me being a history major.
 
baxterdog  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (2)  
2020-01-24 1:46:47 AM  

ababyatemydingo: Yes, I'm celibate.

I sell-a-bit, and the rest I give away


<scene>The old scribe looks up from reviewing the original text, it says CELEBRATE! </scene>
 
Get Rich or Try Dyin'  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2020-01-24 1:48:46 AM  
Bedhead - Beheaded [Full Album]
Youtube U6Cg-mg5LnA
 
chatoyance  
Smartest (6)   Funniest (6)  
2020-01-24 2:59:05 AM  
Wow, the Anglican church in New Zealand has certainly strayed far from God then
This is a billboard erected by St Matthews-In-The-City in Auckland
/giggity
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
PunGent  
Smartest (1)   Funniest (0)  
2020-01-24 3:36:27 AM  

Chuck87: That is their religion and has been that way for hundreds of years.


...selectively enforced all the while.

Just like every other major religion.
 
cynicalbastard  
Smartest (1)   Funniest (1)  
2020-01-24 4:17:01 AM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: <shrug> The Church of England can say whatever it likes to its parishioners.  Let's see how many of them agree, and how many disagree enough to vote with their feet.  And donations. actually give a fark.
/ftfy
 
Iggie  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (3)  
2020-01-24 4:42:41 AM  

King Something: [Fark user image 850x478]


Nice boat.
 
BrainyBear  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (1)  
2020-01-24 5:29:01 AM  

lostcat: [Fark user image 425x266]


The comments and responses to this tweet are comedy gold:

https://twitter.com/Philip_Ellis/status/1220371584378134532?s=20&fbclid=IwAR3lxd2WHDn_j-pwqOUgm-zyvGWM9WAiXvMn0UqCwA4MVfG3p2b1-kSS6KM
 
Shirley Ujest  
Smartest (3)   Funniest (0)  
2020-01-24 5:29:16 AM  
Buuuuuuuut  they are ok with Pedos in the royal family?
 
Tyrone Slothrop  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2020-01-24 5:39:48 AM  
Just another religion only interested in controlling people.

\tear down the churches
 
NaughtyByNurture  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2020-01-24 5:46:28 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
Resident Muslim [TotalFark] [OhFark]  
Smartest (1)   Funniest (0)  
2020-01-24 6:30:47 AM  
Those who sell their principles for being liked get neither respect...nor being liked.
 
dwlah  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2020-01-24 7:37:32 AM  

chatoyance: Wow, the Anglican church in New Zealand has certainly strayed far from God then
This is a billboard erected by St Matthews-In-The-City in Auckland
/giggity
[Fark user image 618x360]


First glance I thought it was a headstone For when they do a double stack on the same plot
 
gar1013  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2020-01-24 7:47:11 AM  

Resident Muslim: Those who sell their principles for being liked get neither respect...nor being liked.


This.

If you want someone to tell you that you are great all the time, and you can never do any wrong, go pay someone to be your friend.

Church isn't about affirming every aspect of your life.
 
IAmRight  
Smartest (3)   Funniest (3)  
2020-01-24 7:56:28 AM  

nitropissering: "The Church of England has stated that sex belongs only within heterosexual marriage, and that sex in gay or straight civil partnerships "falls short of God's purpose for human beings". "

So, wars, earthquakes, floods etc. are the devils purpose for human beings?


Well, yeah, basically what Christianity is is "God gets credit for everything good and man or the devil gets blamed for everything bad. Also, God is both omniscient and omnipotent, so he knows exactly what's going to happen beforehand AND has the power to change it, but he's SO good that he allows all the bad to happen and bears no responsibility for it."

Honestly, I see why Trump fans believe he's godly. God's a no-account deadbeat who blames everyone else for his mistakes and wants credit for every good thing in your life.
 
IAmRight  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2020-01-24 7:58:32 AM  

gar1013: Resident Muslim: Those who sell their principles for being liked get neither respect...nor being liked.

This.

If you want someone to tell you that you are great all the time, and you can never do any wrong, go pay someone to be your friend.

Church isn't about affirming every aspect of your life.


Wasn't the church formed so that people could pay God to tell him how great he is all the time and that he can never do anything wrong? In fairness, why shouldn't they get a little reciprocation?
 
keldaria  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2020-01-24 8:03:19 AM  
I'm always told that god has a plan. If that plan involves someone getting laid then who are we to argue with that plan?
 
gar1013  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2020-01-24 8:06:41 AM  

IAmRight: gar1013: Resident Muslim: Those who sell their principles for being liked get neither respect...nor being liked.

This.

If you want someone to tell you that you are great all the time, and you can never do any wrong, go pay someone to be your friend.

Church isn't about affirming every aspect of your life.

Wasn't the church formed so that people could pay God to tell him how great he is all the time and that he can never do anything wrong? In fairness, why shouldn't they get a little reciprocation?


No.

I'd say "nice try", but it wasn't even that.
 
AteMyBrain  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2020-01-24 8:13:18 AM  
Worldwide, people are abandoning religion in record numbers.

COE: Hold my chalice.
 
mungo  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2020-01-24 8:24:49 AM  
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MtqbscBb9h0
 
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