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(Irish Post US)   I'll see your "jockey sits on dead horse" raise you "jockey rides a dead horse". Don't they know you're supposed to beat a dead horse?   (irishpost.com) divider line
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    More: Followup, Horse, Horse racing, dead horse, racehorse trainer Gordon Elliot, IRISH jockey, Elliott's yard, high-profile trainer, body of a dead horse  
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1670 clicks; posted to Main » on 02 Mar 2021 at 10:32 PM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Copy Link



31 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
cryinoutloud  
Smartest (16)   Funniest (1)  
2021-03-02 10:36:12 PM  
You rang?

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
Judge Judy and Executioner  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (7)  
2021-03-02 10:37:03 PM  
Every year euphemisms get stranger and stranger, I tell you hwat.
 
doomjesse  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (2)  
2021-03-02 10:43:22 PM  
Did the horse object?  Neigh means neigh.
 
169th Cousin [recently expired TotalFark]  
Smartest (2)   Funniest (9)  
2021-03-02 10:43:43 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
SansNeural  
Smartest (6)   Funniest (0)  
2021-03-02 10:46:14 PM  
He was refreshingly contrite, saying "To try defending my stupidity at the time would add further insult and hurt", which is farking true.  But much better not to be an ass-dingle in the first place.

I don't understand how people closely involved with horses can be that disrespectful.  Shoot, I bet a lot of race car drivers and mechanics have more respect for their machines than this.  But hell, there are coaches of human athletes who also don't give a wet fart of respect for their charges.  Goddam humans anyway.
 
duckpoopy  
Smartest (1)   Funniest (6)  
2021-03-02 10:48:10 PM  

169th Cousin: [Fark user image image 850x644]


And I thought "Is a hotdog a taco?" was the stupidest farking question/meme.
 
Somaticasual [TotalFark]  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (2)  
2021-03-02 10:50:27 PM  
Now to be fair,
On the surface that sounds pretty damned impressive....
 
cameroncrazy1984 [TotalFark]  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (1)  
2021-03-02 10:54:00 PM  

169th Cousin: [Fark user image image 850x644]


Nah it would be piggy back
 
cameroncrazy1984 [TotalFark]  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (4)  
2021-03-02 10:55:07 PM  

Somaticasual: Now to be fair,
On the surface that sounds pretty damned impressive....


To be fairrrrrrrr
 
waxbeans  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (1)  
2021-03-02 10:55:42 PM  

cryinoutloud: You rang?

[Fark user image image 408x269]


Oh Christ what fapnation is this from?
 
mrparks  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2021-03-02 11:00:08 PM  
Randy was right.
 
Judge Judy and Executioner  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (4)  
2021-03-02 11:00:16 PM  

waxbeans: cryinoutloud: You rang?

[Fark user image image 408x269]

Oh Christ what fapnation is this from?


It's Jennifer Connelly in a sexually suggestive jif.
 
waxbeans  
Smartest (2)   Funniest (0)  
2021-03-02 11:00:34 PM  
Hum? Don't people eat 🐴 over there?
And ALSO, do dead beast have feelings?
ALSO we let kids have distended bellies and flies in their eyes and take a picture of a vulture about to eat a kid and this is a big deal? 🦆 📴🙄
 
waxbeans  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (1)  
2021-03-02 11:00:59 PM  

Judge Judy and Executioner: waxbeans: cryinoutloud: You rang?

[Fark user image image 408x269]

Oh Christ what fapnation is this from?

It's Jennifer Connelly in a sexually suggestive jif.


From where?
 
The Irresponsible Captain [TotalFark]  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (9)  
2021-03-02 11:01:07 PM  
I thought this was going somewhere else.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
waxbeans  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (2)  
2021-03-02 11:03:25 PM  

Judge Judy and Executioner: waxbeans: cryinoutloud: You rang?

[Fark user image image 408x269]

Oh Christ what fapnation is this from?

It's Jennifer Connelly in a sexually suggestive jif.


Career Opportunities | Locked in a Target with Jennifer Connelly (and Two Robbers)
Youtube IpSEosi37gk
 
punkwrestler  
Smartest (1)   Funniest (1)  
2021-03-02 11:05:38 PM  

169th Cousin: [Fark user image image 850x644]


If a female centaur had a baby would it teeth from the human or horse nipples?
 
leeksfromchichis [TotalFark]  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (3)  
2021-03-02 11:11:34 PM  

punkwrestler: 169th Cousin: [Fark user image image 850x644]

If a female centaur had a baby would it teeth from the human or horse nipples?


Check Thread #11,000,000 at your own risk...
 
Somaticasual [TotalFark]  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2021-03-02 11:18:19 PM  

cameroncrazy1984: Somaticasual: Now to be fair,
On the surface that sounds pretty damned impressive....

To be fairrrrrrrr


To be lair?
 
Kalyco Jack  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (1)  
2021-03-02 11:20:09 PM  

waxbeans: Judge Judy and Executioner: waxbeans: cryinoutloud: You rang?

[Fark user image image 408x269]

Oh Christ what fapnation is this from?

It's Jennifer Connelly in a sexually suggestive jif.

[YouTube video: Career Opportunities | Locked in a Target with Jennifer Connelly (and Two Robbers)]


Was gonna say. That's definitely a very long time ago Jennifer Connelly. Apparently back then actual corporations starred in movies as themselves. Who knew?
 
Sum Dum Gai  
Smartest (1)   Funniest (2)  
2021-03-02 11:22:17 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size

Are we sure the horse was dead before he sat on it?
 
169th Cousin [recently expired TotalFark]  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2021-03-02 11:24:32 PM  

leeksfromchichis: punkwrestler: 169th Cousin: [Fark user image image 850x644]

If a female centaur had a baby would it teeth from the human or horse nipples?

Check Thread #11,000,000 at your own risk...


34?
 
waxbeans  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2021-03-02 11:27:15 PM  

Sum Dum Gai: [Fark user image image 850x446]
Are we sure the horse was dead before he sat on it?


Back many moons ago, we was in Mexico and everyone went on a 🐎 ride.
Anyway. One of the horse 🐎 💀. So everyone joked for decades that it died because my aunt was a fat fark.
 
OkieDookie  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2021-03-03 12:06:51 AM  
It's payback for a horse riding a dead Mr. Hands?
 
mrparks  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2021-03-03 12:35:57 AM  

Sum Dum Gai: [Fark user image image 850x446]
Are we sure the horse was dead before he sat on it?


That's the jockey wrangler.

....what, you thought a 90 pound person would willingly get on top of a thousand plus pounds of animal?

Plus, someone has to keep them fed.
 
7th Son of a 7th Son  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2021-03-03 1:07:14 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
Lurk Who's Talking  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (2)  
2021-03-03 1:24:43 AM  

punkwrestler: 169th Cousin: [Fark user image image 850x644]

If a female centaur had a baby would it teeth from the human or horse nipples?


Glad I went a-googling because I would've thought a female centaur was a centrix*, but it turns out to be a centrauride or centride. Who knew?

To guess the proper nouns of obscure nouns is one of my (ahem) eccentricities, or at least a centrixity in this case, as long as we're beating a dead horse, eh?
 
Lurk Who's Talking  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2021-03-03 2:04:51 AM  

Sum Dum Gai: [Fark user image image 850x446]
Are we sure the horse was dead before he sat on it?


That's an Irish jockey? I thought they'd be smaller once they went metric. it looks like they're still weighing that one in old fashioned English stones.

Lessee: @14 lbs/stone & 240p/£ (Old Pence) ÷ Potatoes/fortnight (Shillaghlees -  green shamrocks + pink moons) = 1 Irish Jockey = 3 Tuns of Guinness/Arse-Dragging-'round-the-Upson-Downs, or 211 lbs or £15.07.01 1/2 or 1 fat Irish jockey who won't be racing furlong.

Are the Irish still trying to pretend shamrocks are money to pay the rest of the World? We keep telling them we'll settle the debt in breakfast & headache beers. Just pay in barrels & kegs & nobody gets hurt. Nice little rainbow you got there. Be a shame if ...

(Nota bene: descended from the McCormicks of County Longford, Meath, now in Leinster. They say no true Irishman forgets to tell his family where they came from so they can go back there.)
 
orbister  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2021-03-03 4:18:25 AM  

SansNeural: I don't understand how people closely involved with horses can be that disrespectful


If they "respected" the animals they wouldn't flog them round race tracks and kill them as soon as they stopped earning money. Not that I see any compelling reason to "respect" an animal anyway.
 
Gway  
Smartest (1)   Funniest (0)  
2021-03-03 5:17:48 AM  
Meh... whatever and nonetheless (and please realize this comment is addressed primarily to all magats):

Upon finding yourself on a dead horse the most logical course is to immediately dismount.

Good luck-
 
HailRobonia  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2021-03-03 9:17:03 AM  

Lurk Who's Talking: punkwrestler: 169th Cousin: [Fark user image image 850x644]

If a female centaur had a baby would it teeth from the human or horse nipples?

Glad I went a-googling because I would've thought a female centaur was a centrix*, but it turns out to be a centrauride or centride. Who knew?

To guess the proper nouns of obscure nouns is one of my (ahem) eccentricities, or at least a centrixity in this case, as long as we're beating a dead horse, eh?


The plural of cactus is technically cactopodes.
 
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