Age gaps in Hollywood relationships have been a huge topic of discussion for decades, but we wanted some insight on it from everyday people.
1. "Got together with a 12-year age gap while in my late 30s. I have two biological children and two step-kids. Ten years later, and he’s still the love of my life. I couldn’t be happier!
2. "An 11-year age difference between my husband and me. I met him when I was 34 and he was 45. We were very upfront about expectations and boundaries at the beginning of our relationship, as I can’t have any more children, and he never had any. We also were both divorced, and he was a confirmed bachelor for over a decade, so we made sure we both weren’t game players. I have two kids from my previous marriage, and my kids are as much his as they are my ex’s and his new wife's."
"He had no issue with not having more kids. He also had no issue with me keeping my maiden name. He has some minor health issues, but I have severe systemic lupus, and I fear I may die before him despite the age difference. The age difference really doesn’t get in the way of our life now. It is fun to call him an old man and ask what life in the '70s was like. Since he is now eligible for an AARP card, I make fun of him more. We are both smartasses, so it works. He was born in ‘72, and I was born in ‘83." —MotherofChoad
3. "Eleven years difference, now thankfully divorced. I was young for my age, and he was very manipulative. I didn't see it then, but I do now that I've got a bit more life experience."
4. "An 11-year age gap between my husband and me. We got together when I was in my mid-20s and he was in his mid-30s. Honestly, the biggest difference I’ve found is that I think you do a lot of growing mentally and emotionally in your thirties. He did a lot of that before he met me and worked out what he wanted out of life. I’ve had to go through that stage with him as my husband. So it’s been challenging in some ways, but overall we’re still strong, and I still love him. We’re on the same page for most things. What does cross my mind from time to time is that I want a second child, and he’s nearing 50 now. I wonder how the next 20 years are going to go. I’m not losing sleep over it, though. This is the life we chose together, and I’m happy with that."
5. "We had a 12-year difference. I didn’t think anything of it, tbh. He was and still is my world. He passed away last year at the age of 67, which is clearly the downside of a big age gap."
6. "I dated my ex from 19 to 30 (35 now), and we had a 16-year gap. Now, being the same age as he was when we started dating, I would feel creepy. Frankly, my nephew is 22 and feels so young when trying to talk with him. I couldn't imagine finding a partner in that age group. Note, we didn't marry, and frankly, one of the reasons I walked away was that I wanted more. I also saw our goals weren't the same, as he was sure in his career, and settled into life, while I was just getting into mine and finding myself. So, no, I don't recommend it at that age. Maybe 70 and 60 are different, but 19 and 35 are too different in time."
7. "That was me at 22, while he was 35. I thought I was so mature, and I admired how much he had his shit together. Turns out, he didn't; that's just how 30-something lives look. I grew up, and he just grew old."
8. "We aren’t married yet, but we've been together for 8.5 years, and have a 15-year age gap. I’m happy, and the gap really is something we only notice when we talk about our childhoods, or pop culture references that go over each other's heads. But we laugh it off. I’m 31, he’s almost 46. I have one child; he has none. We won’t be having any more. Truly, he’s a good man, and I never felt like we were anything but equals. I’ve never once felt manipulated or controlled, or like he was a sleazy guy trying to get with a young girl. He’s been supportive of me, my career, and my independence since day one, and I have been for him, too. We are each other's biggest cheerleaders, and he is my best friend."
"My daughter adores him and views him as a father figure, and my family all love him too. I worry about outliving him, but nothing in life is guaranteed. My only concern is that someday one of us is going to have to go on without the other, and I can barely think of it. It hurts too much. I hear often it’s a red flag for such a huge age difference, but I don’t think our relationship falls in that category. We had been seeing each other for some time before we actually talked about how old the other was, which was silly, but I genuinely thought he was much younger than he was, and he thought I was older than I was. So, by the time we talked about our ages, we were invested. I will also add that we waited to have sex until about 6 months into dating at his request, so it was never about that either. I’ve always felt that we genuinely connected. We just worked." —ilikethisplanet
9. "My partner and I have a 16.5-year age gap. He's 57 and I'm 40. Other people have already touched on the issues I've been having with it (lack of energy and not taking care of his health, mostly). We have a warm, comfortable relationship, and I'm not planning to leave him, but if he died or we broke up, I would never date a man this much older again."
10. "My grandmother was 11 years younger than her husband; she was 22 when they met. I guess it wasn't a big deal for a long time, but he became pretty frail pretty early on, and since she didn't drive, she hated how immobile she was once he had his driver's license taken away. He was also too proud to use a wheelchair, so they basically didn't go anywhere for years when she had just retired and had all that free time. As soon as she buried him, she went on this long cruise through Scandinavia and then to Scotland. I think she felt free for the first time in years."
11. "We had a 13-year difference. I was also very young — 22. He was manipulative and a lot more. We're divorced now."
12. My husband is 12 years older than I am. We got together when I was 21 and have been together for 10 years. It’s been the happiest 10 years of my life. I truly don’t think I could find a better partner than him. He’s an incredible dad and an incredible husband. He’s loved and supported me in everything I’ve done, through all the ways I’ve changed over the years (including gaining 110lbs and now working to lose it). Through all the ups and downs, we’ve been a team. He’s shown me through words and actions that I can always count on him, that when I’m sick or injured, he will take care of me, and when I’m stranded on the side of the road, he will come to help me. I know I will most likely outlive him, especially because most men in his family don’t live past their 60s. The thought of losing him devastates me, but that just means we need to make the most of our lives while we can."
"We travel as often as we can, and we enjoy spending time together even if it’s just to run errands. We are always cuddling and holding hands, even while we sleep. Our age gap has never been an issue to me or my family because everyone could see right away how much he cared about me. The first time my sister met him, she said his eyes lit up as soon as he saw me. I know age gap relationships don’t always work out and can be predatory. But I also know our relationship is the exception to that, and I’m very lucky to have found the love of my life." —lavenderxwitch
13. "Wow! This thread is making me feel less alone. Thank you! We have a 15-plus-year age gap, and the biggest issues were his insecurities about me running off with some younger guy, and his constant complaining about how terrible he looked. Yes, you have gray hair; yes, you have wrinkles. I hardly saw them, though. When you're with someone, you just see them as they are, but it's hard to be attracted to someone who constantly puts themselves down. After five years or so, I came to an understanding that I would be his caretaker at some point, and I accepted that. I have no kids of my own, and he had a vasectomy, so that wasn't an issue. It wasn't my first choice, but I loved him; in fact, I still do."
"It just feels nice to have someone need you, since it looks like kids are off the table for me now. I was ready and committed to that role. Now life has taken a turn, and we are separated after 10+ years. Honestly, it's been really tough trying to find a new direction." —turquoise_tie_dyeger
14. Lastly, "My partner and I have an 11-year age gap. We're not married, but we've been together for seven years. I've noticed myself wishing he would develop the healthy habits I've developed over time. Neither of us has any health issues, but I wonder with his lifestyle if it won't happen sooner or later. Honestly, the thing I'm finding less than enjoyable is that he seems more grumpy over time and not as fun or youthful/playful in his energy. Some of that is age and some isn't, I guess."
