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(Mirror.co.uk)   ♫ On the first day of Christmas my nana bought for me, some g-strings for a Christmas tree ♫   (mirror.co.uk) divider line
    More: Amusing, glittery purple insides, clear plastic baubles, lavender glitter G-strings, Jesus Al yer, lips.. cherry lube, Grandparent, Alex Bermingham, Christmas ornament  
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4582 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Dec 2017 at 8:10 PM (6 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Copy Link



19 Comments     (+0 »)
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kdawg7736 [TotalFark] [OhFark]  
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2017-12-14 12:26:11 PM  
Awkward......
 
2017-12-14 8:18:16 PM  
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Salmon  
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2017-12-14 8:19:54 PM  
Old people have sex too, just google it.
 
2017-12-14 8:21:02 PM  
The G stands for Granny
 
brantgoose [TotalFark] [OhFark]  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (4)  
2017-12-14 8:22:32 PM  
A present for Santa.

WARNING: THE FURTHER YOU READ, THE LEWDER IT GETS"

a) and Mrs Claus
b) and the elves
c) and the reindeer.
 
brantgoose [TotalFark] [OhFark]  
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2017-12-14 8:23:01 PM  
They do make pretty Christmas tree ornaments, though.
 
Fox10456  
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2017-12-14 8:27:46 PM  
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Wait till she figures out what the ear cleaner is really for.
 
2017-12-14 8:31:16 PM  
Better trim that tree.
 
brantgoose [TotalFark] [OhFark]  
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2017-12-14 8:37:54 PM  
I saw Daddy Kissing Santa Claus
Underneath the mistletoe last night
He didn't see me creep
Downstairs for a Peep.
I don't know about you,
But I think Santa is a creep.

Oh, I saw Daddy Kissing Santa Claus
Underneath the mistletoe all right
If you tell Mommy, she is sure to weep
So keep your little mug shut
Or I'll give you sich a (beep)
'Cause I saw Daddy kiss Old Saint Nick
 ...

(Sheet music ends in a trail of blood)
 
2017-12-14 9:00:20 PM  
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turbidette [TotalFark] [OhFark]  
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2017-12-14 11:57:51 PM  
I'd like some g strings for Christmas. I also need d, a, and e. D'addario is fine, mandolin size. A capo would be nice, too. I think I'm ready to try that.
 
2017-12-15 1:51:08 AM  
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Finally a way to properly spice up our annual dip mix ornaments...
 
CoysOdie  
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2017-12-15 3:34:43 AM  

turbidette: I'd like some g strings for Christmas. I also need d, a, and e. D'addario is fine, mandolin size. A capo would be nice, too. I think I'm ready to try that.


Welp, Ya beat me to it.
The hi E on my guitar just broke.
But the electronic tuner said it was flat.
Twist, Ah snap.
 
2017-12-15 9:41:18 AM  

CoysOdie: turbidette: I'd like some g strings for Christmas. I also need d, a, and e. D'addario is fine, mandolin size. A capo would be nice, too. I think I'm ready to try that.

Welp, Ya beat me to it.
The hi E on my guitar just broke.
But the electronic tuner said it was flat.
Twist, Ah snap.


Not as bad as many many years ago when I onstage at  a bar (played bass) and was wailing the hard riff to Neil Young's 'Rockin' in the Free World'.  It was the only song I used a pick for, but that night, my E-string suddenly un-spun at the bridge and slumped across the neck to lay beside the A string.

Only quick thinking thing I could think of to do was jump the bass pattern up an octave. So for the last half of the song, instead of the 'bass' line being 'CHUN-CHUN-CHUN-CHUN- DOOOM DOOOM' it was more 'cha-cha-cha-cha- deee-deee'.   Sort of an anime character voice version of the song I guess.
 
2017-12-15 3:13:36 PM  

turbidette: D'addario is fine


you can say that again!

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She would be a welcome present any time of year, one would think...
 
turbidette [TotalFark] [OhFark]  
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2017-12-15 5:03:27 PM  
Only if she'll clean my house or something?
I'm a farkette.
 
2017-12-15 6:14:01 PM  

turbidette: Only if she'll clean my house or something?
I'm a farkette.


She might if you ask nicely, I guess.  Probably no floors or windows, that's hard to find.
 
turbidette [TotalFark] [OhFark]  
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2017-12-15 6:31:23 PM  

fictional_character: turbidette: Only if she'll clean my house or something?
I'm a farkette.

She might if you ask nicely, I guess.  Probably no floors or windows, that's hard to find.


Maybe she plays bass. If she could keep a rhythm going, that would be more useful than clean windows.
 
2017-12-16 7:30:57 AM  
It's the thought that counts.
 
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