The Best Thing to Drink On Every Major Airline

Call it the "Mile High-Life Club."
This image may contain Logo Symbol and Trademark

Flying coach often feels like paying someone a couple hundred bucks to gently smoosh a bunch of hard-but-weirdly-upholstered surfaces against you while also forcing you to listen to strangers’ mouth noises. Plus you get to be forcibly dehydrated and literally jerked around! It can be sort of awful. Alcohol helps, though (except for with the dehydration thing).

If you’ve ordered wine on a plane, you’ve probably noticed that it’s not very good. This is partially because most airlines serve awful wine. (Also, your taste buds don’t work so well up there.) That’s the bad news. The good news is, there are a surprising number of acceptable drinking options on a surprising number of airlines—mostly because it's been far easier for airlines to pick up good-quality craft beer than it has been to pick up good-quality wine, apparently. And if you're ever in a real pinch, a mediocre bloody mary is gonna be a whole lot better than a really shitty Cabernet. After all, you need something to wash down all those snacks you brought. Here, we’ve organized the major U.S. airlines by the quality of their best drinks.

First Class

American Airlines, somewhat shockingly, serves Woodford Reserve Bourbon now, which is good enough to drink neat or on the rocks. The next-best option is Sam Adams, which I only recommend if you’re a diehard Red Sox fan.

JetBlue offers Lagunitas Pale Ale, a reliable beer from one of the country’s more reliable craft breweries. This is basically the Uniqlo of beer: it’s pretty well-made, most people like it, and it’s easy to find. Plus, they serve Dunkin' Donuts coffee (go Sox!).

Delta also offers Woodford Reserve and Lagunitas, and stocks other well-loved California breweries like Ballast Point and Stone Brewing Company. (They’ve also got Brooklyn Brewery and—this is for my fellow Red Sox fans—Sam Adams.)

Alaska Airlines serves Alaska Brewery Beer, which is extremely good, and also makes you think of things like reindeer, glaciers, and the Northern Lights. 10/10 would recommend.

Virgin America—which will soon fold into Alaska Airlines—serves Anchor Steam, another American classic, which is improved by the fact that you’re drinking it in a plane that feels like a weird alien nightclub. Bonus: if you’re into lighter beer mixed with zesty things, they offer a michelada.

Hawaiian Airlines offers extremely adorable pre-made bottled cocktails (Mai Tais, Lychee Vodka Martinis) in beautiful little vials that look like they should house expensive women’s beauty products.

Economy

Frontier Airlines, the airline that makes you pay extra to carry on a bag, has no top-shelf liquor to speak of, which means your best bet is a Bloody Mary and even more dehydration than you’d normally expect.

Southwest has Tanqueray, which means you should order a gin and tonic.

Spirit Airlines also has Tanqueray, which means you should order a gin and tonic.

Allegiant Airlines also has Tanqueray, which means you should order a gin and tonic.

Lavatory

United Airlines offers Goose IPA and Buffalo Trace Bourbon, which are good, but don’t fly United because they’re trash.


Watch Now:
Action Bronson Makes Us His Favorite Sandwich