BLACK DOG: Is cocky Clive Lewis too big for his 'backwater'?

The cocky antics of Left-wing MP for Norwich South Clive Lewis, denounced for saying ‘get on your knees b*tch’ at a Labour rally, have been noted before. 

Lewis, a former BBC journalist in Norwich, was criticised by a colleague who said: ‘He fancied himself as a bit of a player and was on an internet dating site. His entry said something like, “I’m based in London and Norwich but prefer London – Norwich is a bit of a backwater.” ’

'The cocky antics of Left-wing MP for Norwich South Clive Lewis have been noted before'

'The cocky antics of Left-wing MP for Norwich South Clive Lewis have been noted before'

 

Labour MP Neil Coyle got round a Commons swearing ban by calling the Tories’ Universal Credits, to quote an official Hansard entry, ‘an outstanding compendium of bottom gravy’ – ie, ‘a pile of s***’. 

Corbyn critic Coyle has publicly called his leader ‘absurd’ and ‘terrible’. Dog’s translation: ‘Jezza is bottom gravy.’

 

As Theresa May arrived in Brussels for Brexit talks, Tory peer and ex-Minister David Willetts was overheard striding down a House of Lords corridor exclaiming: ‘This is a worse mess than Maastricht.’ He should know. 

‘Two Brains’, to give egghead Willetts his official nickname, was a Government Whip in the Commons when the Maastricht rebellions paralysed John Major’s government. 

 

Tory MP and ex-Minister Mike Penning, a former Essex fireman, was chuffed to be told this month that he was getting a knighthood – and raced to the phone to tell his mother. 

Mrs Penning’s reaction was a bucket of cold water. ‘What you, son? But you are a complete oik!’ she replied. 

 

Jean's bottom line 

Larger-than-life Tory Baroness Trumpington (Mrs Jean Barker before she was ennobled in 1980), who retires from the Lords on her 95th birthday next month, was once asked how she chose her Lords title. ‘I only knew two villages, Trumpington and Six Mile Bottom, which one would you pick?’ she explained.

 

It’s hard to take seriously the Resolution Foundation warning that Brexit will cost families £500 a year extra when you know its director is former Ed Miliband policy wonk Torsten Henricson-Bell, 35. 

His last big idea was to persuade Red Ed to carve his 2015 Election pledges on the notorious Ed Stone, a giant stone tablet that was never seen again. 

 

MPs pining for the absent chimes of Big Ben – silenced during a revamp – have another problem. 

The scaffolding encasing the building is blocking mobile phone reception. 

Dog hears that Commons Leader Andrea Leadsom will be on to the phone firms to sort it out… once she can get a signal.