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(Kenosha News)   Jamie "Can Head" Keeton has a "superpower." Can you guess what it is? Bonus: He holds a Guinness world record for it   (kenoshanews.com) divider line
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    More: Weird, Keeton, Twin Galaxies, Jamie Keeton, World record, Keeton bills, guinness world, Guinness world record, Guinness World Records  
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6142 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Oct 2017 at 7:41 AM (6 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Copy Link



37 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
tukatz  
Smartest (1)   Funniest (0)  
2017-10-22 5:44:30 AM  
"I'm one of four in the world, and the only one in the United States."

Umm, yeah.... maybe they can get a Las Vegas show.
 
sxacho [TotalFark]  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (2)  
2017-10-22 7:45:46 AM  
He's extra sticky. Ew.
 
Tree Surgeon General  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (6)  
2017-10-22 7:49:06 AM  
I've been known to possess this power.

Then I take a shower
 
Pointy Tail of Satan  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (5)  
2017-10-22 7:51:10 AM  
His atoms have an excess of gluons.
 
sirrerun  
Smartest (1)   Funniest (0)  
2017-10-22 7:59:27 AM  
Oral sex.
 
LowbrowDeluxe  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (1)  
2017-10-22 7:59:39 AM  
I knew a Navy ensign who had the same nickname...
 
Armchair_Invective  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (8)  
2017-10-22 8:00:38 AM  
Keeton bills himself as a "real live X-Man" who loves sharing and showing off his strange ability with strangers.

"I wouldn't let people know about it because I was scared of being called a freak," Keeton said.

Fark user imageView Full Size

That isn't why they called you a freak.
 
elkboy  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (3)  
2017-10-22 8:02:37 AM  
pbs.twimg.comView Full Size


R.I.P. Jamie Keeton ...
 
lack of warmth  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (3)  
2017-10-22 8:03:58 AM  
However, seems like the kind of record you would find in a book of records kept by a beer company.
 
skinink [OhFark]  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (2)  
2017-10-22 8:08:31 AM  
He can generate story clicks!
 
RJReves  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (1)  
2017-10-22 8:18:17 AM  
Fixing the cable?
 
dambis  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2017-10-22 8:21:15 AM  
Lamest superpower behind premature ejaculation.
 
RJReves  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2017-10-22 8:25:00 AM  
8 Lamest X-Men Ever
 
Another Government Employee  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (1)  
2017-10-22 8:25:30 AM  
I can see him at Lambeau in the dead of winter firing off cold ones to his friends.
 
johnnygew  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2017-10-22 8:26:43 AM  
If only his first name was John.
 
Mister Peejay  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2017-10-22 8:27:28 AM  

dambis: Lamest superpower behind premature ejaculation.


68.media.tumblr.comView Full Size
 
Snarcoleptic_Hoosier  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (2)  
2017-10-22 8:36:02 AM  
I refuse to click the link, so I'm going to guess world high jump champion.
 
GreenSun  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2017-10-22 8:38:18 AM  
He gives head.
 
WilderKWight  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2017-10-22 8:48:14 AM  
Overweight, extra-sweaty and sticky man makes best use of his sweaty stickiness.
 
OOF  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2017-10-22 8:55:42 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
Milos Hattrick  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (5)  
2017-10-22 8:59:36 AM  
onlineworldofwrestling.comView Full Size
 
killwhitey  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2017-10-22 9:12:35 AM  

sxacho: He's extra sticky. Ew.


I was thinking the same thing.

Hey baby, my skin is nice and sticky. <sounds of running>
 
morg  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (2)  
2017-10-22 9:21:33 AM  

sxacho: He's extra sticky. Ew.


Sweating gravy is now a super power.
 
Rock Krenn  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2017-10-22 9:26:08 AM  
Clearly, I have been wasting my life.
 
HighOnCraic  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2017-10-22 9:36:20 AM  
Phrasing?
 
SoundOfOneHandWanking [TotalFark] [OhFark]  
Smartest (2)   Funniest (0)  
2017-10-22 10:01:33 AM  
According to Keeton, the pores on his skin draw more air than regular pores and act as suction cups.

ummm, that's not a thing.
 
pueblonative [TotalFark]  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (1)  
2017-10-22 10:21:24 AM  

GreenSun: He gives head.


So did Marie Antoinette. Once

*rimshot*
 
eyeq360 [TotalFark]  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2017-10-22 10:21:45 AM  

Pointy Tail of Satan: His atoms have an excess of gluons.


His boogers are magnetic.
 
Current Resident  
Smartest (1)   Funniest (7)  
2017-10-22 10:47:09 AM  
i.imgur.comView Full Size
 
Milos Hattrick  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2017-10-22 10:48:34 AM  
peterburd.files.wordpress.comView Full Size
 
LordOfThePings [OhFark]  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2017-10-22 10:52:11 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
It_Really_Does_Glisten  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2017-10-22 11:33:18 AM  
Not the hero we deserve, but the hero we need.
 
Eddie Adams from Torrance  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (1)  
2017-10-22 11:40:07 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size


Does not approve.
 
RabidRythmDivas  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (1)  
2017-10-22 3:33:52 PM  
This guy has a real can do attitude.
 
thorpe [TotalFark] [OhFark]  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2017-10-22 7:17:30 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
mudpants  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2017-10-23 11:48:05 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
mudpants  
Smartest (0)   Funniest (0)  
2017-10-23 11:50:39 AM  
s17-us2.ixquick.comView Full Size
 
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